


this one's for you

by segmentcalled



Series: bright day will turn to night [4]
Category: Polygon/McElroy Vlogs & Podcasts RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern with Magic, Dorks in Love, Established Relationship, Fluff, Kissing, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Post-Canon, Remix, Unraveled, fluff with plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-14
Updated: 2019-08-16
Packaged: 2020-09-01 00:30:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20249179
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/segmentcalled/pseuds/segmentcalled
Summary: Through a strange and mysterious course of events, some wild things have transpired.The first is that Brian’s Pokémon spreadsheet got him a job.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> (IT IS!!!!!! ITS FOR ALL OF YOU!!!!!!!! <strike>AND ME ALSO CAUSE I THINK ABOUT THIS AU ALL THE TIME DKFJGHKJF</strike>)
> 
> this is a little bit in honor of pat bday but it's pretty brian-centric sdkfjghsdkfj  
sorry pat for writing 8937528943756489 words about a character that looks and sounds a whole lot like you, i hope you never read this nonsense, ilu
> 
> also: i am pretty sure that this would be at least half a year if not more before this happened irl, judging by the time scale in the main fic, but also i don't care

Through a strange and mysterious course of events, some wild things have transpired.

The first is that Brian’s Pokémon spreadsheet got him a job.

The second is that this job is where Pat used to work. Brian has now collaborated with Thomas on a few scripts; they worked up one for _Kingdom Hearts_ that was a slam-dunk with the viewers, apparently. So they like him, and they want him to write a live episode to finally make use of that truly extensive linguistic work he did for no reason, and actually, hey, do you want to be in it, too?

The third is that this means they’re going to Boston, to meet up with Thomas and company, for a whirlwind twenty-four hours.

The day before they’re set to leave, Brian, Laura, and Pat find themselves at the base of Brian’s tree, leaning against the trunk, as Brian braids stems together. Laura keeps telling him what to do, even though he keeps glaring at her, he’s doing just _fine_, he knows he fucked up a knot, yes, he knows, okay, he’s fixing it, see?

They’re on the far side of Brian’s tree, because the unspoken agreement was that one of them was kind of uncomfortable being in the clearing in line of sight of, like, Brian’s entire family, and this affords them at least a tiny bit more privacy. Well. Brian won’t tell Pat what tree senses are like, but he knows the vibrations of their voices will carry farther than Pat might hope. He can save him some anxiety by conveniently leaving out this piece of information.

“This is stupid,” Brian grumbles, when he has to redo the same section for the third time. “Pat’s so much better at this shit than I am, I should be able to let him do it. Magic is bullshit.”

“Preaching to the choir,” Pat says, though not nearly as spitefully as he might’ve done just a couple months ago. Brian quite genuinely appreciates Chelsea’s intervention on Pat’s behalf; tracking down a witch like Teresa has done wonders for him. He grouches about it, about how hard it is to learn, about how much there is to keep track of, about how he can’t do all the things he wants to do, but Brian’s seen him smile when he makes a spell work. His eyes light up in a way Brian rarely saw so often, before.

“You’re almost done, though. Well. If you’re making a bracelet and not a necklace,” Laura says, and Brian groans.

“Maybe I’ll just string like fifty more acorns on the necklace I’ve already got and call it square.”

“Good luck with that,” Laura says. “Good luck _finding_ fifty of them that are from your tree and also not looking stupid when you wear it.”

“It was a jo-_ooke_,” Brian whines. “Also Thomas and I are matching so I can’t wear anything too obviously different. Oh my _god_ I am so excited.”

“Yeah, yeah, we know,” Laura says, but she’s grinning. She ruffles Brian’s hair; Brian sticks his tongue out at her.

* * *

Brian is fidgety-excited for the entire drive to Boston. It is by far preferable to the last time he was in Pat’s car for an extended period of time, although he admittedly can’t really remember much of it. Mostly he remembers being in a lot of pain and being able to physically feel Pat’s worry. But this time, he’s prepared. He has an appropriate time limit, he has a carefully woven band of leaves and stems around his bicep, and his acorn necklace tucked beneath his shirt. He’s ready for fucking _anything_.

He hasn’t told Pat that much about what to expect. He wants it to be a surprise, because he’s so proud of the work he and Thomas have done, and he wants to see Pat’s face when they pull it off. They’ve practiced it a zillion times over video calls; Laura helped Brian figure out the blocking, and as soon as they get there, he and Thomas are off to in-person rehearsals.

They pick Thomas and Allegra up from the train station; Allegra nearly tackles Pat when she hugs him, as per usual. It’s really sweet, how excited they are to see each other; Pat is smiling that big smile of his that Brian holds dearest to his heart.

Brian follows a half-step behind Pat; he likes Allegra and Thomas, too, of course he does, but he doesn’t want to get in the way of —

Allegra nearly tackles Brian when she hugs him, too, and he can’t help but laugh in surprise.

“Don’t look so shy, you nerd,” she says, “you’ve been officially inducted into the group by virtue of having had a crisis in New York City at least once in your life.”

“Oh, gosh, if I’d known that was the criteria I would’ve come much sooner,” Brian says. “I hope you haven’t been having too many crises in my absence.”

“Nah, things are much quieter without you two causing trouble,” Allegra says.

“You say that because you’re the one causing trouble now,” Thomas says, and she shoves him with her shoulder.

“Lies and slander. We should get going so you two can do your grim work. Man, Thomas, you really weren’t kidding, you guys look so freaking alike with your hair the same length.”

Thomas tosses his hair and Brian links his arm with his, winks at Allegra. “We’re secretly twins. Surprise, Thomas, you’re a tree!”

“Oh wow! No wonder I have asthma.”

“Shut _uuup_,” Brian groans. “It was the best cover-up I had, okay?”

“To think I was going to offer you my sister’s rescue inhaler,” Allegra says, with a dramatic sigh.

“Will you all un-root yourselves and get into the car, please?” Pat sighs. “We’ve got shit to do.”

“That wasn’t even a good pun!”

Pat drops Thomas and Brian off at the convention center; he and Allegra go to deal with the hotel situation.

“We’re supposed to be meeting up with Tara and Jeff at some point,” Thomas says. “I’m not totally sure who else is showing up. We’ll see. Everyone’s super excited to meet you though. Except Jeff. He already knows you. But he’s excited to see you again, too. He liked you a lot.”

“Oh, good, I like him too. Do he and Pat know each other?”

“Yeah! Pat still knows almost everyone, I think, except the interns? No one that’s gonna be here today, anyway. He acts like no one likes him, but honestly, he’s a good dude, he was well-liked on account of he wasn’t all up in everyone’s shit all the time.”

“That is a very good Pat trait, I agree,” Brian says. “Really, I’m a fan of all Pat traits, but I think I might be biased.”

“Pfff. Maybe. How’s he doing, anyway?”

“He seems really happy,” Brian says. “He’s working on magic again, and I think it’s more satisfying to him than he’ll admit. Plus, like, I dunno, he just used to seem so — like —”

“Scared?”

“Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Like something was about to appear out of thin air and fuck up his whole life. He’s chilled out, like, a _lot_.”

“You know that’s ‘cause of you, right?” Thomas says.

Brian laughs, waves the statement off. “Please. I know I’ve got a lot to do with it, but it’s not like it’s all me. It’s Griffin, and Teresa, and you guys of course, and everyone back home. I think, well. I think he just doesn’t feel like. Like he could be abandoned at the drop of a hat — not, oh my god, _not_ that I’m saying, I’m not —”

“No, no, I get you. He was like that even before I knew him, too, to be fair. He does a pretty good job of pretending to be chill, if you take his baseline state to be ‘pretty awkward and uncomfortable,’ but once you know that he’s actually just fucking anxious all the time it’s like, shit, dude, you okay?”

“Oh my god, _yeah_. Like when you first get him one-on-one you get these, like, glimpses of what he’s like when he’s not freaked out? The first time I spent any real time with him was that day we streamed with Jenna. I thought he was just, like, some grumpy dude, but Jenna and I were curious so we brought cookies over. He invited us in and let us play his video games and we stayed ‘till way after midnight just being massive dorks. He laughs with his whole _body_, when he’s happy.”

“That’s adorable.”

“And then he came out to me and he looked like he was going to fucking cry, and I was like oh _no_. He looked so sad and fucked-up about it. I’m so proud of how far he’s come.”

“Me too, honestly. I think the show you guys have together is super cute, by the way. The rainbow background? So good.”

Brian laughs. “Thank you! We decided we weren’t gonna, like, actively announce our relationship, but we’re not hiding it, either. So: gay greenscreen. I’m surprised how popular it’s getting?”

“I think it makes sense,” Thomas says. “Pat’s still got people paying attention to him from his time at Polygon, plus I drag him into my streams whenever I can, ‘cause I think he deserves a bigger audience; he’s a genuinely good dude and he’s funny. And now he does a really goofy and well-produced Wednesday-night stream every week with some cute and charming guy? Like, hell yeah, of course people want to see that.”

“You flatter me.”

“Oh, I was talking about Charlie, not you.”

Brian swats his arm, laughing, and Thomas grins at him.

They meet up with Tara, who’s finagled a free room for them to do a few practice runs. Thomas is not, like, super comfortable singing in front of an audience, so by design Brian literally steals the show. They’ve practiced endlessly — the fucking triplet rap, dear god, Brian’s never gonna not be muttering _Porygon, Porygon-Z, Porygon2, Ribombee_ to himself after all this.

Brian likes Tara right away — she’s blunt and to-the-point, but not unnecessarily. They’ve talked over Skype a little; she’s read the scripts and seen them do their parts out-of-sync, but she looks impressed when they put it all together. She laughs at the right parts, which is encouraging, and her feedback is really positive, despite her sardonic air. Brian’s breathing a little hard, after the dancing, but he’s not worried about it — for real this time — he knows the difference between being out of shape and serious tree-related problems, although Thomas shoots him a concerned side-eye. He waves it off.

They have a lot of time to kill, but not a lot of time in the room to practice — they go through the things that involve them going back and forth a few times, but it feels really solid.

Thank goodness. Brian was worried, though he had no real reason to be. It’s just — it’s a big deal. Thomas is _really fucking popular_. Allegra wasn’t joking when she’d said Thomas had gone viral; it’s only become more exponential since their visit. He’s shocked that Tara and Thomas would take a chance on him like this, let some random dude from the woods script and compose nearly all of a live episode of their ostensibly most well-known series.

They track down Allegra and Pat, after they are kicked out of the rehearsal room; Jeff is with them. Tara hugs Pat in greeting; Pat looks so surprised at this that Brian has to stifle a fit of giggles.

“How have you been?” she asks him, when she lets him go.

“Good, I think?” Pat glances at Brian. “I miss you guys, but I think I’m finally settling in.”

“That’s good!” Tara says. They fall into small talk; Brian disengages from the conversation somewhat, because most of the chat is catching up on things Brian wasn’t involved in.

Brian leans over to Allegra. “I swear to god you’d think they chased Pat out of New York with pitchforks, the way he looks when he sees someone he knew,” he whispers, too quiet for anyone else to eavesdrop.

She matches his volume. “For real. He didn’t even get fired, he left on his own all _sadly_, people were, like, bummed about it. Dude’s way out of touch on how much people like him.”

“What are you gossiping about?” Tara says.

“Patrick,” Allegra says.

“Aw, come on,” Pat says. “Will there ever be a day when everyone doesn’t team up on me?”

“Nope!” Brian says cheerfully. “My love language is affectionately dunking on people and I will accept no complaints or criticism.” He bounces over to peck Pat’s cheek — smiles at how it makes him blush — and says, “Are we going back to the hotel? I’m gonna have to change at some point. Thomas, too.”

“Oh, yeah, I guess. When do you want to do that? I was probably gonna walk around a little bit,” Pat says.

“We can go just the two of us, so you can see whatever you want to see,” Thomas says.

“Are you sure —”

“Yes. What is there, a _Dark Souls_ panel?” Brian teases.

“Actually,” Pat says, with a guilty look, and Brian laughs.

“Go do your thing. We’ll catch up with you later. Anyone else want to go on a journey?”

Allegra joins them; Tara and Jeff go with Pat.

“Are you nervous?” she says.

“Not too much,” Brian says, at the same time as Thomas says an emphatic, _“Yes.”_

“Wow. The duality of man.”

“I’ve done lots of theatre. Like, I mean, not — not large-scale, or anything, but I’m used to performing,” Brian says. “It’s not the crowd that intimidates me. I just don’t want to fuck your shit up in front of, like, your audience, ‘cause I know this is important.”

“I’m nervous about all of it,” Thomas says. “Not you, though, you’re gonna kill it.”

“It’s gonna be fine,” Allegra says. “You’re both gonna be amazing. I saw the outfits you guys chose, you’re gonna look so good.”

“Thank you! We have good taste,” Brian says.

“And modesty in spades,” Thomas adds.

Brian carries his jacket, instead of wearing it, and doesn’t stick next to Thomas on the way back; Thomas and Allegra disappear off to get a snack or something and probably be spotted by fans like they’re a couple of cryptids. Brian’s supposed to be a surprise — he can’t very well do that if they’re standing next to each other in the same clothes and haircut. He finds Pat, instead; Pat pulls him into a quick hug, kisses his temple.

“You look amazing,” he says.

Brian preens, tosses his hair. “Thanks, babe.” He grins. “Ready for the show?”

“Oh, you know it. Are you sneaking in early?”

“Yeah, I better before a crowd gathers. Don’t want to ruin the surprise. Will you come?”

“Of course.”

They set off, too shy to be hand in hand, shoulder to shoulder instead.

“What did you think of Tara? I know she can be — kind of a lot,” Pat says.

“I like her! I definitely am a little intimidated, but not in a bad way. She said a lot of nice things to me and Thomas.”

“Good. You deserve it, you’ve been working really hard. Are you excited?”

“Oh my god, Patrick, I am so excited,” Brian says. The closer he gets to performing, the more his nerves transform into excited anticipatory energy. He doesn’t get performance anxiety, not as such; he wants to show off. He’s _ready_.

“Maybe now I’ll actually understand what all the weird Pokémon puns you keep singing are for.”

“The weird Pokémon puns are for the sake of themselves, Patrick Gill. Even if I wasn’t making a song about them, you would be lucky to hear my puns! You didn’t pick up on a single tree pun until you were directly told, you’re now going to be subjected to them for the rest of your life in punishment.”

“I’m in hell,” Pat groans, as Brian giggles.

They are super subtle and sneaky and probably maybe hopefully don’t get noticed as they walk into the room as the panel before theirs is letting out. They’re super early, and it’s easy to slip behind the curtain and grin at each other like they’ve pulled off a heist. Brian’s definitely solidly into jittery, now, in anticipation. He wishes Thomas was here, so they could talk over shit, but that might make Thomas more nervous.

“Brian, if you’re any more fidgety you’re going to fall off that chair,” Pat says, with amusement.

“I can’t help it!”

Pat reaches for Brian’s hand, holds it in both of his. “What do you need?” he asks gently.

“I dunno. I wish it was time already and we didn’t have to wait back here for-ever. Do you know when Thomas and Allegra are going to be here?”

“Probably in ten minutes or so? I think they have to set up some tech — oh, just kidding, there’s everyone now,” Pat says, as the door opens and Allegra’s laugh precedes them into the room. They can’t see the door from where they’re sitting, just as people entering the room can’t see them, so their presence is an accidental startle.

“I didn’t expect you to be so early!” Allegra says, mostly to Pat.

“Wow, rude,” Pat says. “You told us to get over here early so people wouldn’t see Brian and ruin the surprise. I can follow directions sometimes, thank you very much!”

“Brian’s such a good influence,” Tara says approvingly.

“He’s not, but thanks,” says Pat, as Brian snickers. “Are the pedestrians out so we can start setting up?”

Pat has been recruited, too, as it happens; he’s helping film, which means he’s going to be in Brian’s direct line of sight the whole time, which means Brian’s going to have to somehow not stare at him instead of engaging with the audience. Allegra’s job is to pay very excessively fastidious attention to Thomas and run slides; and Tara is equipped with a camera, too, from a different angle. Jeff gets to watch — he doesn’t do anything with the video team, really, he’s a writer — but he helps set up anyway, detangling extension cords and finding outlets.

Brian helps Allegra get her table set up; fusses with the tablecloth and finds another outlet for her laptop and whatever other bullshit technology they’re using.

“Oh my god, Thomas, it would be so funny if you hid under the table and jumped out from under it at the beginning, instead of just walking out from back here,” Brian says.

“Oh my god,” Thomas says. “I’m doing it. If you don’t mind, Allegra.”

“I don’t care, just stay out of my way so I don’t kick you in the face or something by accident,” Allegra says, distractedly, as she plugs in the adapters for the projector. “Pat, can you come here and help me with this? You’re the tech wizard.”

“Witch, actually, if we’re being technical about it,” Pat says absentmindedly, and Allegra rolls her eyes. “I’m coming, I’m coming, hold your horses.”

Pat is, in fact, the tech witch, mostly because he has to work with the increasingly-complicated streaming setup they’ve devised for _Gill & Gilbert_, and gets everything hooked up with hardly any effort at all.

“This is the real reason we miss you around the office,” Tara quips. Pat scoffs, and Allegra elbows him.

“We do, you dumbass,” Allegra says.

“Yeah, yeah, it’s ‘cause I can plug shit in, a skill no one else has,” Pat deadpans.

“Exactly!” says Tara. “Also, we’ve got about ten minutes ‘till doors open, so everyone get your shit together, please.”

Allegra sits down at the table with a sigh and pulls up the slideshow. “Anything you want to test real quick?” she asks Brian and Thomas.

“Can you make sure that the transition to music works? It would be so embarrassing if we didn’t have the speakers hooked up,” Brian says.

“I hooked up the speakers!” Pat says indignantly, from the other side of the room.

Allegra tests it anyway; it is, in fact, hooked up properly, and even at the right volume. Technological witchcraft, for sure. Brian doesn’t even think that’s a real thing, but Pat’s making it happen.

Thomas and Brian confer about the last-minute details, nailing everything down, until they make their disappearances.

Brian can hear the excited rumble of the crowd — Tara comes back to tell him that they had to turn people away, there’s three hundred people in the audience and they had to tell people that they didn’t have any more space.

Holy shit.

It’s showtime.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> THIS IS A TRANSCRIPT OF THE POKERAP VIDEO, EXCEPT I REMIXED IT A LITTLE AND SPLIT IT INTO A DUET  
OBVIOUSLY I DID NOT WRITE THE ORIGINAL BC BRIAN DAVID GILBERT & CO. ARE GENIUSES

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> transcribing this video took me an entire afternoon and then i went and did this to it sdkjfhgskdfjg
> 
> thanks to bdg for the original, of course

**THE PERFECT POKÉRAP: TRANSCRIPT**   
_ **Presented by THOMAS BIERY and BRIAN DAVID GILBERT, featuring ALLEGRA FRANK** _   
** _Filmed by TARA LONG and PATRICK GILL_ **   
** _Written by BRIAN DAVID GILBERT, with assistance from THOMAS BIERY, PATRICK GILL, LAURA KATHRYN GILBERT, and JONAH SCOTT._ **

[_THOMAS jumps out from beneath the table as the music starts; AUDIENCE applauds. THOMAS struts to the microphone and takes it off the stand._]

THOMAS: Good evening, class!

[_AUDIENCE applauds and cheers._]

THOMAS: Seems the registrar overbooked this one. I’m already sweaty and the show hasn’t started, because we had the bright idea for me to hide under a table for twenty minutes. Uh, I got a question for you: How are we feeling tonight?

[_AUDIENCE cheers._]

THOMAS: That’s wonderful, that’s wonderful. Now that that’s out of your system, I do need absolute silence. This is a lecture, okay? There will be no audience participation. The goal is education, not entertainment. Allegra, start the hype-up music.

[_Music starts playing._]

THOMAS: What you are about to see is the culmination of decades of research. I have developed this work, and I am sharing it here, at PAX East, for the benefit of the masses. Today, my peers will stop laughing at me. Today, they will start seeing me as a person who is worthwhile. Not someone who, and I quote, puts “a lot of research into things that have very little meaning. They’ll see me as an artistic genius, that’s right, and incomparably handsome. That’s the other thing, I forgot to mention that little part.

This magnum opus…

I have unraveled, and shall perform, the perfect PokéRap. Let’s go!

[_Music plays again. THOMAS runs around the room to give high-fives and be a nerd.  
Music cuts out abruptly when THOMAS arrives back at the microphone_.]

THOMAS: But not just yet. I’ve got a few other things that I gotta take care of before we get to the PokéRap part of this. I have a couple things. You see, in order to get this PAX space, we had to sign a contract. This contract was very explicit in its understanding that I would not only perform the full PokéRap, which is defined as including all 812 names of the Pokémon, but before I do that, I have to explain my process.

Now, this contract is being enforced by the enforcers. Hello! Thank you all so much for doing that. Yeah, give them a hand! They’re doing an amazing job this weekend. 

[_AUDIENCE applauds_.]

THOMAS: Wonderful. It is being enforced by them, and they will kill me if I do not see it done before the end of this panel time. Thank you for your service. Now, you might be wondering —

[_THOMAS points at screen_.]

AUDIENCE: [_reading from screen_] Thomas, is a perfect PokéRap worth all this hardship?

THOMAS: Again, no audience participation. But, of course! Of course it’s worth the hardship. Look, magnificent goals are worth the challenges it takes to reach them. You wanna know where I learned that tasty morsel? The original PokéRap.

You see, back when I was a child, I loved Pokémon, but I loved Pokémon for foolish and childish reasons. I loved them for their names, I loved them for their designs. My favorite Pokémon was Growlithe. It’s just a cute little fire puppy, what’s not to love? I had a Growlithe that I nicknamed Gary in my Pokémon Red version. I loved him. I kept him with me at all times. He was wonderful.

But then, I heard the original PokéRap, and it taught me that things were only worth doing if you did them the most. It’s the completionist’s philosophy. You gotta catch ‘em all. So I put my childish ways behind me, and I began to collect every single Pokémon.

But in order to complete my PokéRap, I had to go to BRIAN DAVID GILBERT.

Brian David Gilbert… was a jerk. But, he was a jerk who had Pokémon Blue version, and I needed a Weepinbell and Victreebell in order to complete my PokéRap. That’s only in Pokémon Blue. And I was ready, I went over to his house… I was so excited to trade and finally complete that PokéRap. I had an Oddish ready to go, that seems fair to trade for a Weepinbell.

And then Brian said he only wanted Gary, because he knew that Gary was my favorite Pokémon. And he, and I quote, said that he wanted me to “give up something I loved.” Which is legitimately a _wild_ thing for an eight-year-old to request!

Which is why it doesn’t surprise me that Brian David Gilbert IS IN JAIL NOW. It’s true.

Just kidding, I don’t know what Brian’s up to now. He’s probably a performance artist or something. But he _could_ be in jail.

HE CERTAINLY DESERVES TO BE.

So I gave up Gary, and I completed my PokéRap. That’s how far I’m willing to go in order to reach my goals. And today, my goal is to give you the perfect PokéRap!

Let’s split this presentation up: One, the shortcomings of the original PokéRap. Two, the development of a better PokéRap. Three, the performance of the perfect PokéRap.

Alright, so, let’s begin. The shortcomings of the original PokéRap, or what I like to call it: Why the original PokéRap is a travesty. Now, this might seem a bit harsh, but that’s because you are viewing it through nostalgia goggles. Over the next five minutes, I’m gonna take those off your face and replace them with the pragmatic transitions lenses of reality.

I’m looking around the audience and realizing some of you might be too young to have heard the original PokéRap, and for those people: Buckle up! This is gonna be a fun presentation. But I’ll just synopsize it: it was a “rap” that listed all 150 of the original Pokémon, played at the end of every episode of the original TV series.

And that brings us to our first shortcoming: The original PokéRap is a mid-2000s suburban mother’s conception of rap. The rhymes, the flow, are bad. Now, I feel comfortable calling it this, because the only difference between me and a mid-2000s suburban mother is a few more trips to Nordstrom’s.

But the rhyme scheme. Terrible, terrible. Not only is there a line that rhymes Horsea with Weepinbell, a slant rhyme so terrible that even Emily Dickinson would vomit — there are English majors in this group, hell yeah, alright! But even if you ignore the rhyme scheme, you can’t ignore the flow. It’s what we in the industry call “Educational Rap Flow.” That’s defined as a rap wherein you could include an anti-drug line and it wouldn’t sound out of place.

For example: Ditto, Cloyster, Caterpie, Sandshrew. Friend’s got weed? Just say no thank you!

Second shortcoming: It is a bad grocery list of Pokémon. The writers didn’t do anything to differentiate the Pokémon. Take this line: Dratini, Growlithe, Mr. Mime, Cubone. Not only are these four Pokémon completely different elemental types, they’re totally different in quality. The emotional whiplash I feel going from Dratini, what a sweet one! Ooh, Tangela, a cute little tumbleweed with some Jordans, isn’t tha — 

[_At the sight of Mr. Mime, THOMAS bolts away across the room in fear._]

THOMAS: OH GOD! OH NO nononononono. Please get — NO! Oh no no no. Cub — I’m okay.

See, the writers were so focused on putting all 150 names in, they forgot to make a good song. Oopsie daisy! See, most songs have cohesive themes, they build to something, end on a high note! You want to know the final Pokémon of the original PokéRap? It’s Arbok. Not the graceful Articuno, whose very breath could freeze a man in an instant! 

No. It’s Arbok, whose main powers include… being a snake?

And that leaves us with our third and final shortcoming.

Now, this one might get me in a little bit of hot water, but here’s the thing. I’m not afraid of stoking controversy if it means I can say the truth. Okay? So the original PokéRap… is no gesamtkunstwerk.

That’s right, I went there! Yeah! I’ll say it again!

[_BRIAN DAVID GILBERT enters. He is dressed to match THOMAS, in the same blue suit and floral shirt; their haircuts and glasses are even very similar._]

BRIAN: Excuse me?

[_THOMAS whips around; they stare at each other, in the fashion of that one picture of the two Spider-Men pointing at each other_.]

THOMAS: A gesamtkunstwerk?

BRIAN: [_impatiently_] No, no, we all know what a gesamtkunstwerk is, that’s not why I’m here. I heard you were talking about me.  
[_Addresses AUDIENCE_.] Hi, I’m Brian David Gilbert. This man’s got it twisted.

[_THOMAS looks indignant_.]

BRIAN: You see, I had Pokémon Blue version. I needed an Arcanine and a Growlithe to complete _my_ PokéDex. I had a Vulpix ready to go, perfect to trade for a Growlithe, right? But no. My favorite Pokémon was my Tangela. Terry the Tangela. He was my constant companion, the head of my team, the champion of my heart.

But when I asked Thomas to trade me a Growlithe, he _insisted_ upon Terry in return. He would accept no substitutes. Because he told me, and I quote, that he wanted me to “give up something I loved.”

THOMAS: Wait —

BRIAN: Now where were we? Ah, yes. Section two. The development of a better PokéRap.

THOMAS: What?

BRIAN: You took my Terry. I’m taking your presentation.

THOMAS: You took my Gary!

BRIAN: [_Ignoring THOMAS, pacing across the stage, forcing THOMAS to the sidelines_.] Now, we have our three shortcomings, so in theory, all we need to do is fix those, and we’ll have a better PokéRap.

THOMAS: Except! If you’ll remember, back at the very beginning, I signed a contract saying I’d list all 812 Pokémon in the PokéRap, or else the enforcers would perform MMA on my body.

BRIAN: Oh, I know. Trust me.

[_BRIAN winks, and barrels on as if he had not been interrupted_.]

The original one has a 50 PPM, that’s a rate of Pokémon per minute. If we keep that same rate, then we’re going to end up with a 16 minute and 15 second song. Uh-oh! That’s too long. If I forced you to sit through 16 minutes of me just listing Pokémon, I really _would_ deserve to be in jail.

[_A pointed look at THOMAS, who has now dejectedly taken a seat at the table next to ALLEGRA. He sits slouched in the chair, frowning at BRIAN for stealing the spotlight_.]

BRIAN: But, we up that rate to 96, we’ll end up with an eight and a half minute song. And that’s totally normal everyone listens to eight and a half minute songs please don’t question it okay?

So let’s fix some shortcomings, shall we? First one, how do we make a mid-2000s suburban mother’s conception of rap into something that’s listenable? Now, I would never claim to be an expert rapper. I’ll go on the record: I’m not a rapper. But I do claim to be an expert in one thing that will help us make this PokéRap a little bit sexier.

[_BRIAN points at the screen_.]

BRIAN: Feet.

[_Beat_.]

BRIAN: [_quickly_] Metrical, like, poetic feet. I should have phrased that differently, I think? Maybe?

AUDIENCE: Brian, are you really going to use your creative writing degree to help create a PokéRap?

BRIAN: That was such an obvious test! How did you fail the “no audience participation” thing again?! I swear!

[_BRIAN exchanges an exasperated look with THOMAS, who shrugs_.]

BRIAN: But since you asked nicely, am I that type of person? I am… b. That’s a metrical foot. You might not know it. But for real, metrical feet are going to help us out so much. You see, there are a bunch of different metrical feet, and they’re going to help us with the flow of the rap. We have this unique, weird songwriting problem with the PokéRap, in that we have all of the lyrics already written. It’s just all of the Pokémon names. So, we’ve gotta piece them in to make something that’s good. It’s kind of like if I bought twelve IKEA cabinets and used the pieces to build a Gundam.

So I made a spreadsheet. Because that’s what I do! I took all 812 of the names, I split them up by rhyming phoneme, I split them up by metrical foot. But we’re going to talk about one metrical foot in specific. It’s called a dactyl. It’s got three syllables; it’s a stressed followed by two unstressed. And this is super important to us, because it’s gonna give us our “triplet flow.” Or our Migos flow, Versace flow, it’s used in mumble rap a lot. Whatever you call it, it’s gonna help me say a lot of Pokémon names in quick succession, without sounding like a cop.

So, here’s an example of one Pokémon that’s a dactyl. It’s Tangela. TAN-gela. Another would be Arcanine.

[_THOMAS looks up sharply_.]

BRIAN: AR-canine. Tangela, Arcanine, Tangela, Arcanine, Tangela, Arcanine, Thomas here made me trade Terry for Arcanine and _I will NEVER FORGIVE HIM!_

[_THOMAS stands, hands braced on the table._]

THOMAS: [_matching BRIAN’s intensity_] You are a liar, you took my Gary and I will never forgive _you!_

ALLEGRA: Both of you shut up, I’m going to the next slide.

[_THOMAS sits, glowering. BRIAN scowls, before continuing_.]

BRIAN: Okay, so, second shortcoming. This is a pretty easy fix. We just have to differentiate the Pokémon by their elemental type. But let’s remember, quality is also important. If we split them up by fighting type, then we might take Machamp, who is a super powerful, wonderful Pokémon, and put him next to Conkeldurr, God’s mistake in the Pokémon universe. But speaking of Pokémon gods, there are in fact literal Pokémon gods.

Arceus up there, they supposedly created all Pokémon, and it feels kind of weird to put the mythical, legendary, and ultra beast Pokémon in with the Pokémon peasantry, as I call them. Because if you did that, you might put Arceus next to Bidoof. And that’s kind of like if I made a list of characters that are popular in America, and I put Jesus next to Garfield. Technically, I’m not wrong, okay? But I should probably plan it better.

And then the third.

[_THOMAS stands and picks his microphone back up. He interrupts before BRIAN can explain, and starts speaking as he returns to the front_.]

THOMAS: This one’s simple. We just make it a gesamtkunstwerk. Obviously.

But in case you’re getting it confused with the architectural understanding of gesamtkunstwerk — and no one would fault you for that, it happens to Brian all the time.

[_BRIAN glares at him_.]

THOMAS: I’ll specify we’re talking about Richard Wagner’s understanding of the gesamtkunstwerk as an all-encompassing artwork that is unified through theatre. The thing about gesamtkunstwerks is that we have to put it in the theatrical realm that we’re talking about. So, we’re talking about rap. We’re talking about song. That means we’re going to be talking about musical theatre.

And that was a bit of a difficulty for me, because I’ve never done musical theatre before. I had to do a lot of extra research, this was like an extra week of time on this thing that we can —

[_Slide changes behind THOMAS; it is a picture of BRIAN (labeled as such, for clarity) from his high school musical theatre days and reads, “USE YOUR RESOURCES.” THOMAS turns to see it, at AUDIENCE’s response. BRIAN stands beneath the screen, arms folded, looking smug. THOMAS narrows his eyes at him_.]

THOMAS: What.

BRIAN: I did musical theatre all through high school, you know.

[Slide changes again.]

BRIAN: And was in an a capella group, and — whatever that is — I — uh, okay, that's enough — You can go to the next slide, okay? Go to the next slide! _Allegra_. How did you get those pictures, what, I don’t have a Facebook, did my mom send you these? Go — next one. Allegra. Next one.

ALLEGRA: I’m going as fast as I can —

BRIAN: You can go faster, I can press —

[_ALLEGRA shoves his arm away_.]

ALLEGRA: I’m going as fast as I can go!

[_BRIAN turns to walk away, sees the slide change to another picture_.]

BRIAN: _Allegra_. Please, what, just go —

[_BRIAN, resigned, gives up and starts to walk away, but THOMAS smugly beats him to center stage_.]

THOMAS: So the thing about the gesamtkunstwerk is that it’s more of a process than anything else. It’s what you do with the things you have. So, we have two incredible building blocks with these two first shortcomings that we fixed, and we’re going to use them to create something, like the clay to mold into something special. Spectacular.

And originally I was going to come here to make a fun PokéRap. It was going to be a perfect one, but it was going to be fun. Something that, I don’t know, you’d memorize to impress your friends at school or whatever. But now I realize that this is something that you could use to audition for Julliard.

[_BRIAN has now taken the seat next to ALLEGRA. He raises a skeptical eyebrow_.]

THOMAS: I don’t care about making the perfect PokéRap anymore. I am making the perfect _song_.

So. How are we gonna do this?

First things first, we gotta pay homage to the original PokéRap. That’s simple. Let’s throw in some educational rap. You know? But this time we’ll put actual education into it. And because this is a gesamtkunstwerk, we can use different types of theatre to differentiate the Pokémon. Different disciplines of theatre.

So, for example, the psychic Pokémon, I’ll be doing a contact juggling performance. And for the ghost Pokémon, those will be read in eulogy form, so I hope you brought your tissues. There will be a live sand painting of every Eeveelution. Paul Giamatti is here, going to perform the full Jigglypuff song, in full costume. There will be ice sculptures. Fireworks. One of these cups is poisoned! There will also be the Blue Man Group, and they will fight to the death for your entertainment. And if everyone checks under their chairs right now, go ahead, feel free…

You’ll find NOTHING THERE. THERE IS NO AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION.

And I’ve been thinking about those Pokémon gods. The legendaries, the mythicals, the ultra beasts. How could I possibly sing about them without lessening their power? How could I possibly talk about their divine omnipotence? Verbalize their otherworldly grace? Catch such a dream from the air?

That’s right: interpretive dance.

You see, there’s this thing in musical theatre. It’s called a dream ballet, and it’s when the writers aren’t good enough to express emotions through words, and so they just make people dance them out for them. And so I’ve hired the Nederlands Dans Theatre to create a 30-minute movement piece that will encapsulate all 81 of the mythical, legendary, and ultra beast Pokémon, leaving us with the most perfect song ever written, coming in at a runtime of…

[_THOMAS’s voice drops nervously_.]

THOMAS: ...about four hours and thirty minutes.

[_BRIAN leaps to his feet_.]

THOMAS: This is a little bit longer than what we originally planned for, but here’s the thing. Every single one of these seconds is ethereal, it’s wonderful, it’s —

[_Slide changes to read: THE CONTRACT_.]

BRIAN: We don’t have enough time to finish this!

[_BRIAN rushes over and pushes THOMAS out of the way; THOMAS staggers dramatically and stares at him_.]

BRIAN: If we don’t finish this by the end of the panel time, the enforcers will knee-strike our vital organs. I signed this too, you know.

[_Slide changes to zoom out on the contract where both THOMAS’s and BRIAN’s names are listed. BRIAN looks at the enforcers_.]

BRIAN: Look, I know it’s not your fault, you’ve done a lot of great work today, I really appreciate it, and I can’t, like, you know — great job. What’s your name?

ENFORCER: Matt.

BRIAN: Matt? Matt, was it?

THOMAS: ANOTHER TEST. NO AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION, MATT. But, like, what does it even matter, you know? I’ve already lost it all. I can’t perform the whole thing. It’s kind of like… when I gave up Gary to Brian.

[_BRIAN looks at THOMAS, questioning_.]

THOMAS: Just so that I could finish my PokéDex. I was so blinded by the glory of success that I gave up everything that was important to me in the process. In this instance, it’s my life.

BRIAN: No, we can’t give up, we can cut it down. We’ll cut the whole contact juggling performance. You know what, actually, we’re just gonna have to smoosh together all of the Pokémon types. I know he said he wouldn’t do that, but whatever. We’ll have to trim some names — we’ll do an abridged dream ballet, which means the Nederlands Dans Theatre can _go home now_. Okay, they’re fine. And that would leave us with eight and a half minutes or so? Just like I said.

But we’d have to cut… We’d have to cut like 400 Pokémon names in order to do that. And the contract specifically states that we need to say all 812 of them, or else we will die. It’s, like… there’s no physical way that we can say that many Pokémon names!

THOMAS: Brian?

BRIAN: Yeah?

THOMAS: If that’s… well, if we can’t make it, at least I can make one thing right. I still have my Pokémon Red game. I still have Terry.

BRIAN: I… I still have mine. Which means I have Gary. You’d really give him back? You’d send Terry home to me?

THOMAS: I would. For Gary.

[_They share a beat of eye contact, and then both rush for opposite ends of the stage. They return to center stage with Game Boys. On the screen, a picture of a Tangela appears on the left, and an Arcanine on the right. The trade music and sound effects play, and the Pokémon on the screen trade places._  
_There is a pause to linger in the moment, and then the slide switches again to a countdown timer, with dramatic clicks counting down each second. BRIAN and THOMAS exchange a look of horror, and then THOMAS visibly brightens_.]

THOMAS: Wait, I have an idea! Maybe the two of us can’t say four hundred more names — but three hundred people could.

BRIAN: _Audience participation_… Alright, that’s perfect! Let’s take the whole right side, I need you to just choose some of these names. Okay? It’s not that hard, just pick ‘em at random, whichever ones you want to go ahead and say. If you can’t read them all back there, just make some up, that’s fine. 

And on the count of three, I need you to yell them out as quickly as possible. Are you ready? Three, two, one —

[_RIGHT SIDE AUDIENCE definitely yells out all of the names perfectly_.]

BRIAN: STOP. Okay! Same with you. This list now. Okay? Just go ahead and choose, again, two or three of them, whichever ones you want to pick. Different sections. You ready? Three, two, one —

[_LEFT SIDE AUDIENCE also perfectly says every name on the list_.]

BRIAN: Stop. Technically, there’s a high probability that all of those Pokémon names… they just got said. Those names just got said. And there’s no way that Matt over here can verify it didn’t happen! So we’re good! We can do this! Okay. During the educational rap section — remember this, educational rap — I’m gonna call on the right side, and then I’m gonna call on the left side, and you’re gonna need to yell those out, okay? Got it?

THOMAS: But can we… can we really call this shortened version still perfect?

BRIAN: [_dismissively_] Yeah. Yeah we can. I was thinking back to that younger version of myself, who was… he was so excited to complete his PokéRap, and yet he was so empty without his Terry. My “perfect” PokéRap wasn’t perfect. You know what was perfect? My ragtag team of Pokémon led by the indefatigable Terry the Tangela.

And now he’s _back_, baby. And between us all — this PokéRap is perfect because of the ones we’ve kept. The ones we’ve found again. Okay?

THOMAS: The original PokéRap taught us the wrong lesson. It is not that we should catch them all. It’s that we should love the ones we catch.

BRIAN: But again, I do still need you to yell out those Pokémon names, ‘cause if you don’t, Matt will murder us. Are we ready to perform this?

[_AUDIENCE cheers_.]

BRIAN: Okay. One second, before we hop in. I, um… I was originally planning on completing this ending on Arceus, the highest of the god Pokémon. I don’t think that’s right anymore. I think that we should take this moment to celebrate those Pokémon that have stayed dearest to our hearts, even so many years later.

So Terry, Gary… this one’s for you.

[_Music starts_.]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just a silly bonus chapter! by the time you scroll down here the next one that's actually like my own writing should be up too FDKGJHDF


	3. Chapter 3

There’s a meet and greet sort of deal, afterwards; Brian expects all the attention to be on Thomas, but he’s stunned when not only he’s recognized, but even the people who _don’t_ recognize him want to talk to him, get a picture with him, whatever the case may be. He and Thomas get roped into taking pictures in a litany of goofy poses. Pat, too, is fondly remembered, and looks charmingly pleased-overwhelmed at the positive attention.

It’s _fun_ — Brian’s always at his best when he’s surrounded by attention and excitement and people. But the very, very best part is afterwards. When the room is finally clear, Brian flings his overly excited, sweaty self into Pat’s arms, and Pat laughs and swings him around in a circle and holds him tight.

“That was so good, Brian, oh my god, you were amazing,” he says, quiet, just for Brian to hear; he kisses him quick. “I’m so fucking proud of you.”

Brian pulls him into a tight hug again. He doesn’t care how overheated and sweaty he is; he’s got Pat’s arms around him and that’s his favorite thing. Pat kisses the top of his head.

“C’mon, let’s get our shit packed up, then I think we’re all going out to celebrate? We’ll stop for you guys to change first, though,” Pat says.

“Oh, good, ‘cause I’m gross,” Brian says. Now that he’s calmer, he just feels damp. Icky.

“I don’t think you’re gross,” says Pat, who is the best boyfriend.

“I want to shower but I definitely won’t have time for that,” Brian whines.

“You definitely won’t, you take twelve thousand years,” Pat says. “Don’t forget your water bottle.”

Brian at least washes his face and copiously reapplies deodorant, back at the hotel room, and changes into a shirt he’s stolen from Pat (one of the ones that’s not an edgy band t-shirt) and jeans. Everyone else is in the hallway, waiting for him and Thomas in the next room over to be ready to go, so he tries to be speedy.

When he walks out of the room, Tara and Pat are talking quietly and seriously off to the side — ooh boy, what’s that about? — but everyone else is loitering and chatting aimlessly. Brian doesn’t want to interrupt if it’s something important, no matter how much he would like to drape himself around Pat and be obnoxiously snuggly, so he approaches everyone else instead.

“Finally! Took you long enough,” Allegra says cheerfully. “C’mon, guys, let’s get this party started,” she says, and hooks her arm through Brian’s to lead the way. Brian glances over his shoulder, to make sure Tara and Pat got the memo — they did — and allows himself to be swept up.

Before they get inside, though, Pat catches Brian by the shoulder and he disengages from Allegra, turns towards Pat questioningly. Tara disappears inside with everyone else.

“What’s up?” Brian says, reaching out to rest a hand lightly on Pat’s hip.

Pat looks a little dazed. “Tara — she — I — she offered me my job back?”

Brian’s blood turns to ice for a half-second, jumping the gun to the probably-inevitable, before Pat quickly continues.

“But, like, not — I wouldn’t — I wouldn’t have to move back? Like, they’ve got more people, uh, working remotely and stuff, now, so they have precedent, and so I could. I could stay, of course. I’m not going anywhere, baby, don’t make that scared face, I’m not going anyplace you can’t follow. I promise.” He kisses Brian’s forehead. “I’d be doing the same sort of thing I was doing before, but from Maine.”

“That’s amazing,” Brian says, with no lack of relief. “Are you gonna take it? Or did you already say yes?”

“I wanted to talk to you about it first. I — I dunno, it just didn’t feel right to make a big decision like that without at least running it by you. Like, nothing’s gonna functionally change, or anything, I just — you’re important to me. So I wanted to hear what you had to say.”

Brian hugs him; he can’t not. “Of course I think you should go for it, Pat. I think that’s incredible. I know how much you’ve been missing doing that kind of thing. I’m really happy for you.”

“I’m really excited,” Pat says, with an air of confession. “And, uh. She sort of implied, a little — I dunno, I don’t, like, want to, like, tell tales out of school, but I got the impression you might expect to be pulled aside by her, too.”

Brian pulls away to look at him with surprise. “What?”

Pat looks surprised that he’s surprised. “Did you see what you did tonight? Brian, baby, you’re incredible. Fucking _electric_. You’re so talented. I’m so goddamn proud of you. How could they possibly not want you to stick around? You’re brilliant.”

Brian kisses him, and it is _all he can do_ not to pour his whole soul into it, to keep it a quick publicly-acceptable smooch, but he thinks Pat probably gets the picture anyway, because when he pulls away Pat is smiling that dreamy smile he gets sometimes when Brian does something he really likes.

“Let’s go inside,” Brian says. “Before they wonder where we’ve gone off to.”

“Or we could run away and make out.”

“That’s for _later_,” Brian teases, and takes Pat by the hand. “Trust me.”

“Oh my god,” Pat sighs, and follows him, still smiling.

* * *

Tara does, in fact, find a moment to talk to Brian. She asks if he might be able to make it to New York for the whole, paperwork and training and whatever, and Brian chews nervously on his lip.

“I’m not really able to leave Maine for more than a day or two,” he says, carefully, cautiously.

Tara nods, like this actually makes sense to her, and then says, “Is it a magic thing?”

Brian nods, biting back his surprise.

“Fair enough. I mean, I don’t think it would matter either way, if you can’t leave for long, no matter what the circumstances are, then we can work around it. Will you need time to recover from this trip?”

“Probably,” Brian admits. He’s fidgeting with his acorn necklace again; he hadn’t even realized he was doing it, man, what a dead giveaway. “Only a week or two, though, I’d guess?”

“Whatever you need,” she says. “We’ll be able to work with you for accomodations.”

He could hug her, he’s so grateful, so relieved, so astonished that this could even possibly work out. But he stays the very vision of professionalism and keeps talking logistics with her, and then Pat walks past and she waves him over and they compare calendars and suddenly Brian has plans to go back to New York City for _exactly two days_ with Pat for their new job. He really does hug Tara, then, because he goes for a handshake and she laughs and hugs him and he can’t stop grinning.

“I don’t know why you’re surprised, you wrote nearly this entire liveshow,” Thomas says, watching Brian barely restrain himself from dancing around in excitement. “I’m gonna make you write all my shit from now on.”

“You wish,” Pat quips, approaching with Allegra. He wraps an arm around Brian’s waist, drops a kiss on his temple. Brian catches Allegra smiling at them and pretends not to notice. He leans into Pat, tucked up all alongside him. “I’m gonna head back, I think, you coming?” Pat says to Brian. This is about as clear of a proposition as Brian’s ever seen from him, especially with other people around. He doesn’t tease, though, doesn’t want to deter him or embarrass him.

“‘Course. Let me say bye to people first? I’m not sure if we’ll see them tomorrow.”

“You’ll see them in, like, two weeks,” Pat says, complaining good-naturedly, and follows Brian to chat with Tara and Jeff for a few more minutes. He thanks Tara profusely for the zillionth time and she waves it off for the zillionth time, amused. He hugs Allegra, hugs Thomas, and then lets Pat take his hand and lead him to their room.

Pat kisses him slow and sweet, after the door closes behind them. He cups Brian’s face in his hands and Brian holds him close, suddenly nearly overwhelmed with the rush of affection he feels for this wonderful, wonderful man. Pat sighs against him and Brian pushes his hand up the back of his shirt — not even for any reason other than the need to be close to him, to touch him.

“Hey,” Brian says, and Pat pulls back enough to look at him, to blink at him with a dazed little smile. “Hey, I love you.”

Pat’s eyes go wide; his lips part and he stares at Brian for a full several seconds, full-out stunned.

So Brian says it again: “I mean it, Pat Gill, I love you a _whole lot_.”

“I love you too,” Pat says, soft and earnest. He strokes his thumb over Brian’s cheek, pushes his hair behind his ear, something like pure wonder on his face. “I’m so proud of you. You’re — god. You’re amazing. I’m so lucky to have you in my life? I — shit, Brian, not to get too emotional or whatever, but, like — I dunno where I’d be without you.”

Brian kisses the corner of his mouth. “You’d be doing something amazing. I’m sure of it. Because you’re amazing — no, nope, don’t argue with me,” Brian says, pressing a finger to Pat’s lips. Pat kisses his fingertip, which makes Brian giggle. “You’re cute!”

“You’re cute,” Pat says, and pulls Brian into a tight hug. “I’m so glad I met you.”

“Me too,” Brian says. He pushes his face against the side of Pat’s neck and closes his eyes. “Can I say something real sappy?”

“I think you just did,” Pat teases.

“Don’t ruin it!”

“Sorry. I love you.”

“I love _you_.” Brian pauses, traces his fingers over Pat’s back. “You feel like home to me,” he says quietly. “I’m so glad we get to do this together.” He hopes Pat understands what _this_ means. It’s too big of a concept to put into words. Honestly, he might mean _everything_.

“Me too,” Pat says. He holds Brian close, strokes his hair. “I feel the same about you. You mean the world to me. Like — fuck, Brian, I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. You’re amazing. You — and everyone, but you especially — god, I — I’m so grateful that this was the place I ended up. Thank you,” he says, his voice dropping to a whisper.

“Baby, you don’t have to thank me for anything,” Brian says. “I’m just happy I get to be with you.” He turns to kiss Pat’s jaw. “Come shower with me, love.”

Pat pushes his face into Brian’s hair; Brian can’t see his face, but he _knows_ he’s blushing. “You can’t call me that all the time now or else I’ll _die_,” Pat says.

“Yeah, uh-huh, I’m sure. You love it.”

Pat sighs with his whole body. “Yeah, fuck, I really do. Guess I’m into you, or something,” he teases, finally releasing Brian.

Brian steals a kiss. “I thought you might be. Now c’mon, I’ve been waiting all day, let me take your clothes off already,” he says, tugging at Pat’s arm. Pat goes easily, laughing. Brian doesn’t think he’ll ever get enough of his smile.

He’s lucky, though, because he’s right here to see it. To put that smile on his face. To wrap him in his arms and tell him over and over exactly how much he loves him.

Pat blushes crimson and kisses him.

Brian has, quite possibly, never been happier.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THIS ISNT VERY LONG, SORRY  
to be fair i wouldve posted it all as one chapter except i needed the transcript to be separate
> 
> ANYWAY I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS SILLY LIL THING!!!!!!!!! LOVE YALL!!!!!!!!!!

**Author's Note:**

> @segmentcalled on twitter / comment if you req / i have a bunch of pending requests blplease if you think thats you you should tell me cause im NERVOUS to accept ppl i dont know but if ur like sup thats me but dont post this comment i will delete it and follow u back !!!
> 
> LUV YALL!!!!!!!!!!! also shoutout to the people who have been making fan content of this series. it means the world to me. you guys are the greatest and i am FULL OF INFINITE LOVE AND APPRECIATION!!!!!!!!!! ♥♥♥♥


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